Last week we "sprang forward" and turned all of our clocks ahead. But secretly? I'm turning the clock back, baby. I have just purchased a skin care system (that's what they call it when it's more than one substance that you slap on your face. They don't call it "a bunch of stuff" they call it "a system") from the Time Defiance line. Because, well, a close scrutiny in the mirror suggests that it is indeed the moment to begin defying time. Actually, it suggests that I ought to have started defying time two years ago, but alas. These moisturizers are formidable. And brown. I've never used a brown face cream before and am certain it is a sign of seriousness and scientific advancement. If I use everything according to the directions, I figure that I ought to look like an infant by May. I haven't actually read the directions yet, mind you, but I'm hoping that part of the system is to look fiercely into the mirror (without scowling, obviously. Scowling causes wrinkles.) while applying moisturizer and saying three times "Time, I defy Thee!" I think that would be a nice touch.