Breaking News

As I lay in bed this morning trying to find the will to get up, I listened to the news on NPR.  This, incidentally, is a pretty terrible way to begin the day, but while demoralizing as all get out, it is, at least, informative.

According to this morning's report, American gun sales are up. This is, presumably, a result of President Obama suggesting that perhaps we should do a little research before indiscriminately selling sub-automatic weapons to criminals and insane people. Me, I'd opt for just not selling them at all, but then I am a naive, constitution-stomping, California peace nick. The announcer spoke with an expert who said, "This is the most polarizing, emotionally charged issue in America" and I thought, "well, except abortion."  And then it occurred to me that there is probably a Venn diagram with a big, fat overlapping middle (a phrase that may be unconsciously colored by my all-cake-all-the-time diet over the last month) that shows gun enthusiasts in one circle and anti-abortionists in the other, the irony of which made me laugh a bitter, hopeless little laugh. Then I put a pillow over my head and hit the snooze alarm.

When next the radio sprang to life, the discussion was about the American diet and the doom inscribed therein. Here's what we eat too much of:  Sugar.  And meat.  And simple carbohydrates.  And here is where I would like to point out that there has been no meat whatsoever in the cake I've been eating for every meal. So there.

When we become too sickly and obese to function properly, I imagine our gluten-free vegan overlords won't be armed with anything more than vegetables and superiority. That should be plenty.